Confession & Accountability

I have really been struggling with my walk lately... well since I was born really, but you know what I mean. I have struggled with alot of selfishness and pride. I have had a very rebellious feeling towards reading my Bible and sheparding my wife and kids. And I have been battling with lust and the temptation to look at pornography. Fortunately I am very blessed to have two accountability partners, Chad and Boone, whom I can be totally honest with. Accountability is important for several reasons, but I think it is exactly what the Bible is getting at when it says that we should confess our sins from one to another (James 5:16). In Chad and Boone I gain accountability because they come along beside me and encourage me towards righteousness. But it only works if I am honest in confessing my weaknesses.

Pride and selfishness are two sides of the same coin. I hate them. I hate them because they reveal the ugliness of my heart. I hate them because they deepen the chasm between me and God. From Pride I get the desire to fulfill the lusts of my flesh; and selfishness is really just a word describing the acting out to fulfill this lust... if only for a brief moment. I don't really feel any better when I dont read my Bible - I usually feel worse. Nor is there any fulfillment in lust or pornography... rather, I am left feeling tainted, plagued and lonely. The fruit of sin is emptiness - plain and simple.

On the other hand, when I read my Bible, I am fed and fulfilled with the milk of the Word, the river of life, and the meat of sound doctrine. I am exhorted, encouraged, and I am guided in wisdom and truth when I make the reading of the Word a High priority. It is edifying and uplifting. It filters through to the rest of my life so that I want to glorify my Creator through the sheparding of my wife and children. I am fortified against the temptations of pride, selfishness, and lust. I am well equipped to glorify God, and worship Him through my actions.

I really liked Boone's post on Repentence. I have been contemplating a post on confession for a couple of days now and I think that it really compliments the post on Repentence. There is a critical difference between confession and repentence. Simply because I confess a sin, does not mean that I have repented. Nevertheless, confession is a critical aspect deserving of attention. It is the first step in repentence.

It can be very hard to be honest with myself... to truly delve into the root of wickedness contaminating my thoughts and actions. But through the tools God has graciously given us, we can be convicted by the Holy Spirit, encouraged by His Word, confess our sins before Him and from one to another, and repent - "for the kingdom of heaven is at hand!"